I've had this problem to the meanest, >first question "what version of windows are you using sir?" LoL
"oh, um, I, um, Could you just tell me the gateway,mask,static ip, and does your isp curb any prot traffic when I torrent? please?" "are all my 65000 ports open?" "can I nmap my neighboor because he's asked me nicely to pen-test him? will you kill my connection or is that sweet?"
Yes they get defensive, Yes they put you onto "someone who can answer those questions", Yes, this call will be recorded for training purposes, and Yes, "I've heard of linux - We don't normally support that and you'll have to google it but here's the gateway,mask,ip etc"

...and crumbs at the laptop shop ARGHH, they don't even have a hardware list -ala everest or whatever, and according to every last one of them windows comes "free" with every computer so they aren't going to refund "nadda" thank you very much!!