multitude of issues, only in Debian 6.11

While i really enjoy the distro 6.1, i find some rather unpleasant missing features

1... "my document" HAS to be on the desktop...(i really hate any icons)
2. if i disable the icons, i lose mouse menu-s on the desktop ....
3. logins, ...when i logout, it just shutsdown, and when i adduser, i cannot login as a 2nd user, Nor is there a login manager that works


the rest of my issues are w/the Nvidia card i have
NVidea nx6600 GT and my display doesn't want to work at all w/this card. (with 3d)
the onboard video works fine, and when using the nvidia drivers, i get an "out of bounds" report on my monitor (which is a 27"LCD tv/vga monitor (that also has DVI (thats going to my ps3)
but thats another issue

really, my largest issue (right now) is i accidentally turned off the mouse/ desktop menu's.
ive dont this before, from disabling icons, but now, i still have an icon, and yet my right mouse button doesnt have its menu any longer, and i don't know where the config is.

not to mention, my terminal windows are all microscopic in FONT, for the display.
sort of a pita to setup

seriousely, E-16 is much easier than this
http://i39.photobucket.com/albums/e1...otsofmye16.jpg


My objective is to
1. have a stable living room pc for my roommates (who barely know what a mac is, let alone anything not M.S.winblows) can use, and loginto
2. have separate sessions for each user
3. i do like to show the 3d desktop to friends who come over, and try to convert them to linux, and this is what makes the DEBIAN 6,1 DVD so awesome, but if the install is painful, who would i give it to ?
4. have E-term, or other terminal window with a readable FONT.
---as far as i tried, i could not increase the font of the terminal window that was in the menu....
5. have mouse menu's (and not need a panel at all)
6. 3d is nice, but only after the mouse can access all menu's and or at least an terminal window , and no icons/ panels/ junk

thanks for any help